Effective parenting

There are six things that children need from you to help them grow up to be healthy and capable adults.  

The following information was provided by S.K.I.P, a community programme aimed at keeping New Zealand children safe and nurtured.

Love and warmth

Show your child how much you love them. Give them lots of praise, be positive and try not to say negative things.

Be realistic about what they can and can’t do.  For example, you can’t expect a 1 year old to eat without making a mess, or a 2 year old to sit still for a long time.

Talking and listening

Talk to your child as much as you can in simple language they can understand, and listen to what they say to you.

Guidance and understanding

When you tell your children how their behaviour affects other people, you help them to become responsible and caring.  Be clear about what you want your child to do or not do, and give the reason why.

Limits and boundaries

Make sure your rules are fair, and suit your child’s age.  Have as few rules as you can, and stick to them.

Consistency and consequences

Children need to learn that words and actions should match.  So it’s important that you don’t tell them one thing then do another.  Try to respond in the same way to your child’s behaviour each time.  If they do something wrong, make sure you respond in a respectful and reasonable way, so the consequences suit what they did.

Security and structure

To feel safe, children need to know what to expect.  Try to have routines, so things like bed time and bath time happen at the same time every day. Reduce the risk of injuries by making your home child-safe. Try to have some routine in each day so your child feels secure.

S.K.I.P Wheel

Take a look at the SKIP wheel, which shows how these things fit together to create a secure world for your child



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